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Category Archives: The wEdge of ACCEPTABLE EXPRESSION
A$$ in the Hole
Someone stop the Air Force, please. Cancel the four public meetings scheduled to take place this week throughout northcentral Montana. The Air Force, faced with fifty abandoned Minuteman nuclear missile silos, wants to implode the underground facilities or load them … Continue reading
The World (of Walter) at War
My friend, writer Walter Kirn, has been dealing with some tough issues, as you can see in his blog at www.http://walterkirn.blogspot.com/ Walter recently lost his mother and had a bout with a kidney stone. Here’s my reply to his recent … Continue reading
Fiction Writer’s Treasure
If you are a fiction writer, save the 36 page Department of Revenue insert in today’s Great Falls Tribune. With over 300 names on each page, this list of unclaimed property is a treasure chest of character names. On the … Continue reading
“Sit, Bitch, Sit ” or Why Women are Better than Men or Dogs
Remember Pavlov, the scientist who taught us about conditioned response? He rang a bell and a few moments later he’d drop a little kibble in front of his canine subject. The animal became so accustomed to the tinkling sound that … Continue reading
Stand by for Doom
“It’s for the End Times.” I looked at my calendar, then I looked at the clock. I knew I’d hear this sooner or later. It was March 18, 2011, 3:10 p.m. My first “End Times” gold buyer. It’s not unusual for … Continue reading
Bon Voyage, from Dead Claire
There’s a pile of Sympathy cards on my daughter’s coffee table, spilled out on the floor. She’s got a nice dry red in a stemless wine glass. It matches her eyes. I’ve been dead for three weeks. She misses me. … Continue reading
Posted in The wEdge of ACCEPTABLE EXPRESSION
Tagged dark humor, death, funerals, humor, satire, unconditional gifts
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And the Survey Says…
Kotynski came into my class with her bag of Web 2.0 tools and shook them out expecting a high speed connection. My brain is still on phone modem, but I managed to grab a few tools as they bounced off my remaining grey matter…among them the Zoomerang Survey tool that I embedded into my blog last Tuesday evening. Continue reading
The Slow Leak: Fatty Food & Fossil Fuel
I’m a Great Falls native, a product of local public schools, and a lifelong resident. I ain’t no anemic eastern liberal…still, I found myself looking at the Chinese-made flags waving from distended lawn chairs and wondered how long our redundant filtration systems can persevere before our webbing gives way and our collective asses wind up in the gutter.
If we boil ourselves in our own oil…could I have fries with that?
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Posted in The wEdge of ACCEPTABLE EXPRESSION
Tagged Bonanza, Claire Baiz, deepwater horizon, fat, fatty diets, fossil fuel, Hoss, independence day, obseity, oil dependence, oil spill, patriotism
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Eating Sito’s Ka’ak (pronounced ‘cock’): Embarrassing Lebanese Pastry
Sito was the queen of a Lebanese pastry with an unfortunate name, ka’ak (pronounced ‘cock’). Every Christmas Sito would pinch off hundreds of ka’aks with her tiny hands, branding each soft mound with a nasty metal tool just before shoving a batch in the gas oven.
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Posted in The wEdge of ACCEPTABLE EXPRESSION
Tagged baker's, baking jokes, ka, ka'ak, Lebanese pastry, pastry, satire, Sito, soft porn
11 Comments
No Mood for Neighbors
God, I hope she doesn’t have a dog. Every time I look at a dog I see an asterisk of an asshole, and envision its center dilating and depositing organic waste like a pasta extruder.
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Posted in The wEdge of ACCEPTABLE EXPRESSION
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